Join Today & Get 4% Cash Back Then 6, 7...Up to 10% Off Reorders!

April 13, 2008, 11:42 am
Flag as Inappropriate skatss  

Marie Barone, Raymond's mother, said it first, it's good for couples to fight.

"New research at the University of Michigan shows that hashing out marital disagreements is actually good for your health. It's squelching anger, especially when you feel you've been wronged, that's dangerous.

A study published in January followed 192 married couples in Michigan from 1971 to 1988 and found that those who kept their anger in when unfairly attacked did not live as long as those who expressed their anger, says lead study author Ernest Harburg, Ph.D., an emeritus research scientist at the University of Michigan's School of Public Health and psychology department.

"We're all interested in longevity," says Harburg, who's studied the health effects of spousal sparring for over 30 years. "We watch our diet, we exercise. Now we need to add 'express anger constructively' to that list."

Women in particular may put their health at risk by holding back during arguments with their spouse, a 10-year study of 4,000 men and women from Framingham, Massachusetts, found. "Women who 'self-silenced' during conflict with their spouse, compared with women who did not, had four times the risk of dying, " according to findings published in 2007 in the journal "Psychosomatic Medicine."

The story in CNN goes on to talk about ways people fight that isn't healthy and how people should fight.

Well Marie should know.

It makes sense that the quicker we get the anger off our chests, the better The cold war between partners is never healthy and just builds up unnecessary stress. So yes, vent, don't kill each other and go make up.

I've always said this. The problem is most people don't understand the difference between fighting and arguing and healthy discussions. You can have a heated discussion without being mean and fighting and yelling.

My thinking on this is that if you are regularly communicating with your spouse you probably won't argue too much.

The problem is we are so busy and caught up in life that it is hard to make time for each other. To me, lack of communication usually equals misunderstandings which then leads to arguments.